To Be Alone.

The scripture reads, "It is not good for man to be alone."  But I think this isn't just God talking about "man" as in the male species, needing a wife.  I think it is much broader.  Humans need humans.

The last couple of weeks have been unusual for me, with long days stretching out over time, and myself alone much of it.  Either with little babies or by myself.  And I find myself wilting as the days go by.  Needing the vigor of good friendships.  But my life has altered, and most of theirs have not.  My girlfriends are still off to work during the day, my Charlotte friends are out to enjoy city nightlife on the weekends and my out-of-town friends are still... out of town.  And my days find gaps and space of life with just... me.

So I pick up the phone and talk to Amy, our giddiness apparent across the lines.  Or gab on for an hour with Kelsey, connect with Kelly, or discuss life with Mark's mom... These conversations can make me jump with spark, excited to hear another voice.  But there is still something that lacks when you simply need the person side-by-side, physically, across the table or at a soccer game or walking through Target.  A phone call can only carry each person so far...

To be honest, sometimes I love my quiet. I spend Mondays cleaning and laundering and creating a meal plan for the week.  The quiet with the preparation is like gentle streams of water.  And pockets of this through the week, too, are my solace.  Working from 9-12 with a break at home for a couple hours afterward is like a gentle reward, relaxing and gaining back my energy.

But somedays, its just me.  Home.  And alone.  So today I wandered, created to-do list, and finally at 1pm took myself out to Dean and Deluca for coffee to actually get my brain stirred and moving.  There are things I need/should do, but my soul has just kind of shrunk in the quarters of being home alone the third day in a row.  So I mustered myself and just simply walking out the door felt bright and cheery and worth doing.

And it leads me here to ponder God's Word: it is not good for man [human] to be alone.

Kelsey and I were talking about it the very subject this week.  About young couples who disappear or singles who assume the want to.  Both of these are hurtful and can be harmful, to both couples and individuals.  We are called to community, to live as the Church, to bear one another's burden, to mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice.

In relationship, we flourish.  We laugh louder, we hug tighter, we discuss deeper.

Research shows that human beings have an innate need to physical touch.  Babies don't develop appropriately without it.  We need this touch to feel loved, to know we are connected.  How much more than as adults do we need people who touch our souls with their laughter, understanding, input, and presence.

Practical living shows it:  rather than sitting alone to watch a football game, people gather at homes or stadiums, for the coming together heightens the experience.  Rather than eating at home alone, women invite others in or meet for lunches or coffees for fellowship.  Rather than studying God's Word alone, we are enlightened through Sunday teaching or Bible Study and discussion with application.  Rather than runners preparing alone, they run Cross Country side by side to spur, encourage, and challenge each other on.

There is something about being together, in community, that is scriptural as well as practical.  I find myself with little to think about, little to write about, little to pray about if I hole up in my home.  But in the presence of others, all of these come to life, and I, too, feel alive.  And also prepared and full to be alone once again, and then to cycle again into community.

People need accountability, enjoyable events to attend together, a forward motion towards something bigger than themselves.

Being alone has its time and its space.  Its beautiful at times, trust me.  But being alone is not created for the human soul, solely.  We are created for relationship with God and others.  I wilt without it.  So I find myself looking back to the original Garden for words and wisdom in order to once again, bloom.